Scotlandball

Scotlandball is a ball located north of Englandball, He, along with Englandball, Walesball and Northern Irelandball are part of UKball. He is the land of bagpipes, haggis, ships and Braveheart. As of September 2014, he cannot into independence (I LIVE AGAIN!!) though he can into being good uncle to evil brother's childrens.

History

 * Repeated glaciations


 * First known permanent houses on Scottish soil around 9,500 years ago


 * Mists of time


 * Pictballs and blue paint


 * A missing SPQRball legion and as a result a very large wall


 * Pictballs organise and call themselves Dal Raita


 * Irishball arrive and join the Pictballs


 * Lots of standing stones and sniffing mushrooms


 * Albaball takes over,


 * Vikingballs attack the coastline, lots of fighting by hotheads


 * Englishball asked to help arbitrate a empty throne and then steals it


 * Scotball and Franceball stir the muck!


 * Scotball takes over Englishball crown, och aye!


 * A lot of rain,


 * Scotball tries to develop some colonies in North America and bankrupts itself!


 * Englishball steals Scotball independence by buying its debt. No!!!!!!


 * Build ships that sometimes dinna sink


 * Have a lot of oil and kippers,


 * Whisky!!!!!


 * Tourism to search for Nessie, muhahaha!

Character

 * Very philosophical.


 * Good poetry.


 * Bad temper.


 * Argues by shouting,


 * Can keep a feud going for centuries even if the original reason is lost,


 * Must hate the Sassenach!


 * FREEDOM, maybe not, FREEDOM, maybe not, FREEDOM, maybe not.

World class cuisine

 * Jam sandwiches,


 * Haggis,


 * Porridge,


 * Kippers,


 * Neeps and tatties

Weapons

 * Bagpipes to make the evil deaf (Such as Reichtangle)


 * Trident nukes REMOVE


 * Tossin the caber!


 * Clamped
 * supah leet snipa to kill UKball

Relationships

 * UKball - Gib independence NOOOOWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 * Irelandball - Wants independence from UK like he did
 * Argentinaball - Maradona is best Scotlandball player
 * Nova Scotiaball - Lost son
 * Norwayball - Uncle in the frozen north
 * Maltaball - Grandson in the Mediteranean
 * Australiaball - Grandson in the tropical south
 * New Zealandball - Grandson in the frozen south
 * Shetlandball and Orkneyball - Adopted kids from Norwayball
 * Franceball - Auld Alliance!
 * Walesball - Needs to apologise for being Englishball mercenaries!
 * Singaporeball - wee fella likes calling me the best uncle, heh, love ya too , ya wee rascal.
 * USAball - another fella who likes calling me the best uncle, although I'm still iffy about the civil war.

Typical Scottish Greetings

 * ah ya bastart - Ouch, you bastard!
 * bawbag - scrotum, pejorative (That guy's a bawbag)
 * hoot - what "hoot are you talkin aboot"
 * numpty - an endearing term/lovable idiot. Shows friendly banter ("Och your a right numpty")
 * Scunner one who pisses ye aff, also used when hurt yourself (oh ye scunner that hurt)

Fine line between Insanity and Brilliance
We are not sure what side of this line Scotball falls under but he has been busy and has invented the following:

roads, bicycle, tyre, condensing steam engine, propeller,, teller machine, world's first refinery, light bulb, criminal , [], Hockey, sevens, , the syringe, the scanner, the body scanner,, the , the , the , the , the toilet, the first distiller to triple distill, whiskey, the macintosh and the suit

Gallery
Escociaball Scotlandball