Swedenball

"Börk börk börk"

- Sweden

"Marvel at everything, even the most commonplace."

- Carl von Linné

 Swedistan  Swedenball, officially known as the Kingdom of Swedenball (Konungariket Sverige) is a sovereign state and Constitutional Monarchy on the Scandinavian peninsula. His clay is composed of 20 subdivisions known as governorates, including his capital Stockholmball, giving him a total area of 450,295 square kilometers (173,860 square miles), making him the 55th largest country in the world, and 16th in Europe. He is the 89th most populous country in the world, and the 33rd most popular human migration destination.

Being a Norse or Nordic country, as well as being in Northernmost Europe, Sweden has membership in both the Nordic Council, European Union, and the Arctic Council. However despite the invitations, Sweden has refused to accept membership in NATO and has remained neutral since the early 19th century (which means  Switzerlandball and Swedenball are great friends).

Sweden's relationships are rough with his brother Denmarkball and his friends  Norwayball,  Icelandball,  Faroeball,  Greenlandball and  Russiaball for a long time (SINCE THE VIKING ERA!). These days they get along well enough, but may still get into fights.

Do not let his neutrality fool you, even though it is a country that does not fight in wars for 200 years, Swedenball has one of the most advanced military industries in the world. Swedenball is the third largest exporter of war material in the world, behind only Israelcube and  Russiaball. But despite advanced and comprehensive war industry, Swedenball is an extremely peaceful country in terms of international conflicts. In fact the last war Sweden involved was in 1814 against Norwayball, that is, more than 200 years ago.

Due to his neutral status, Swedenball is sometimes mocked by other countryballs as a "naive little butterfly" who is accepting of all countries (even when some of them, like Somaliaball, begin to override and culturally enrich him). Swedenball likes to ignore these jokes, being a overly-tolerant and sensitive countryball.

His national day is 6th June and his Zodiac sign is Gemini.

Vikingar
Sweden was pillaging with his brothers and sisters in Europe for a long time, back when he was a Viking. Swedish Vikings mainly traveled east to Miklagård, Serkland and Österled, but also took part in expeditions towards Western Europe. Sweden was the last Nordic country to be Christianized, because Sweden was very believer of the Norse Paganism, his Uppsala Temple was even a hub of pagan activities. Also Sweden is the Nordic Country with the most of Runic Inscriptions, especially in the province of Uppland.

Medieval
When he got back to home he started to fight his sisters and brothers. After a lot of fighting Denmarkball forced him to join  Kalmar Unionball, which Swedenball did not like. A few centuries later he rebelled against Denmarkball and became an independent kingdom again in the 16th century, and also decided to become Protestant, though it was mainly to take all the money that the churches in Swedenball had been collecting.

Stormaktstiden
He fought in the Thirty Years War against  Holy Roman Empireball lead by our glorious Gustavus Adolphus! Gustavus Adolphus spread protestantism, made Swedenball  great stronk power and took many clay! However stronk power ended after Tsardom of Russiaball,  Denmarkball and  Poland-Lithuaniaball declared war on him. Karl XII was stronk general king that won many battles (Narva, Kliszów) but lost at Polava and was banished to kebab. Karl returned to Swedenball later, invaded Norwayball and died.

Modern
After the Great Nordic War, Swedenball became very liberal, until 1772 when Gustav III said he no longer was. Napoleon happened to Franceball and Swedenball was yet again at war with  Russiaball. Sweden lost Finlandball to  Russiaball in the war of 1809, after that Swedenball was forced into war with  UKball by  Franceball but nobody died. Swedenball got new prince, Carl Johan, and joined against Franceball. Because he did so good in the war Swedenball received  Norwayball as gift, but Norwayball did not like that. Swedenball forced Norwayball into union and became  Sweden-Norwayball until 1905. During this time Sweden also invented dynamite.

World War I
Sweden was neutral during WW1. However, he was sympathetic to both sides, trading with both the Central and Allied powers, and even briefly co-occupied Ålandball with  Germanyball.

World War II
Swedenball also maintained neutrality during the Second World War, which he is very proud of. This time, he was extremely cautious to avoid the fate of his Nordic brethren, and attempted to avoid doing something that could inflame Nazi Germanyball. When Nazi Germanyball demanded Swedenball to allow him to use his transit system during Operation Barbarossa, Swedenball agreed. Swedenball also traded steel with Nazi Germanyball, something the Reich desperately needed. On the other hand, however, he was sympathetic to Jewish refugees, sheltering many from Norwayball and  Denmarkball from the Holocaust.

Postwar Era
Swedenball was one of the very first neutral nation in WWII to join UNball. Because his industry wasn't decimated by the war, he helped Northern Europe recover for the decades following 1945.

During the Cold War, he decided to maintain his strict neutrality policy. He still had stronger relations with NATOball and allies, though, as he feared a possible attack from  Soviet Unionball. Despite this, he refused NATO membership in fears of violating his neutral policy and angering the Soviets.

More recently, Sweden established the global furniture company BÖRKEA IKEA, and has made many famous video and computer games, and many of them have themes such as war and torture (such as Battlefield and Amnesia and World in Conflict, in some cases Minecraft ) to fuel his need for violence. He recently let some steam out, and decided to participate and support multiple peacekeeping missions and wars against terrorists, finally ending his true neutrality. While he still has rediscovered some of his former bloodlusts, he still is relatively neutral and offered to hold summits for multiple leaders.

Sweden highly legalizes LGBT. He is one of the few European balls that correctly takes care of immigrants. Often, native Swedes and immigrants live and integrate peacefully. However, there have been some exceptions with far-right wingers staging protests and violent refugees.

Every single Christmas, Sweden builds a Yule Goat in Gävle, but most Holiday seasons, it gets burned down, but Sweden keeps building it no matter how many times it gets burned down.

Mina Kompisar (My Friends)
Swedenball is kind of friends with everyone, but the most important ones:
 * Canadaball - Can into legalize LGBT and he is my Liberal friend across the Atlantic. I especially love Justin Trudeau. Good job in the IIHF.
 * Finlandball - Adoptive brother and he hates Russia but we are hockey rivals. My second closest friend
 * Norwayball - Best brother, my other half. He sounds like me.
 * Germanyball - He let me into EUball and he also can into allowing kebabs into his clay. But he loves  Stupid wife.
 * Kosovoball - Ally and good friend. Me and Denmarkball help him when he is in trouble by his enemies (Serbiaball), I even have a base in his clay
 * Thailandball - My Asian Wife, She love Farang! she thinks farang = ATM  more than 300,000 Swedes visit Thailand every year.
 * Brazilball - So, you think you like saying HUE? My is BÖRKing.
 * Indonesiaball - Friends from the Southeast world, He very likes IKEA and H&M.
 * Japanball - Thanks for translating Caramelldansen in your language, I appreciate it!
 * USAball - I KICKED YOUR ASS IN HOCKEY ON MAY 19th 2018 in the IIHF! Nice playing though. Some of his states are crap because you know, police brutality and crime, I also don't like your president. But you've got Fellow Börk which I like.
 * Philippinesball - He is part of ASEAN just like  Thailandball and  Indonesiaball. We share the same yellow shade. He also likes  Norwayball and H&M. I have an embassy in Manila and he has an ambassador in Oslo.

Neutral

 * Denmarkball - Neutral brother. We are good friends as of today but we fought a lot back in the past, Great Northern War for example. And he still rambles about me taking his clay. We got a love/hate relationship. Thanks for hosting the IIHF 2018! I won the Gold Match for the 2nd consecutive time! its sad to get your ass kicked by Latvia but dont worry, I beated him for you in the Quarterfinals.
 * Netherlandsball - I know you love weed and that's what I don't want and you just lose the match against me. We still trade with each others, and hey, don't be sad, have a bag of cool stuff I just traded to you!
 * Estoniaball - Actually good friends. We cooaperate on of project, and has a union in my clay. We used to own them, but that was long ago. BUT FOR LAST TIME ESTONIA CANNOT INTO NORDIC!

Vet inte dom (Don't know them)

 * Israelcube - Looks like you are murdering poor Palestine! Just stop killing them! Let them have mercy and I recognize them because I am sick of you killing Arabs.
 * Minnesotaball - His heritage was Norwayball, my ugly brother, and he has the most Swedish-American people.
 * NATOball - Actually I was helping him but not anymore. I am a neutral countryball and you still let me attack some people! I ÅM NEUTRAL! GET ÅWÄY FRÖM ME! Thinking about joining or of helpings you though, but Russiaball is threatening me.
 * Kebab - I don't know who he is but I am not a kebab that he sometimes claim. I am not going to be a kebab because you are bullying poor Kurdistan.

Idiot Fiender (Idiot Enemies)

 * Chileball - Hates me because I have more subscribers on Youtube! PEWDIEPIE STRONK!  But not for long
 * Franceball - We took their general and made him king. Bernadotte stronk!
 * Moroccoball - I dare you I double dare yuo boycott me or I impose sanctions against you!
 * Pizza Brony - Cannot into world cup qualification Höhöhöhöhö!
 * Polandball - You may be part of EU, but you are still xenophobic and homophobic. Soon impose sanctions on you!  AND THIS TIME I WILL SUCCESSFULLY CONQUER YOU! 
 * Somaliaball - OK SOMALIA! I OF HAD ENOUGH OF YUOR IMMIGRATION, I AM NOT YUOR COLONY AND STOP WITH YUOR ARABIC VIKING RAIDS PIRATES STEALING EVERYTHING!!! I WILL OF MONITORING YUO NOW!!! Damned pirates. No Minecraft and IKEA for yuo
 * Uzbekistanball - YUO OF TERRORIST! Yuo of kill börk using truck through Stockholm. Will not of stand. BÖÖÖÖRK! That is so racist to say of me, but at least you are secular.
 * Tepliceball - OF STUPID FLAG STEALER AANNOYING.

JÄVLA KUKSUGARNA!!!! (FUCKING COCKSUCKERS!!!!)

 * Myanmarball - HOW DARE YOU ATTACK MY ASIAN WIFE THAILAND!!! THAT'S IT!!! NO MORE BÖRK FOR YOU!!! REMOVE BURMA!!!I HAVE HAD IT!!
 * Russiaball - DU ARE THE WORSE IN POLITICS! PUTIN DU SUCK! Russia SUCKS AT HOCKEY! THEY EVEN LOST TO CANADA! Stupid Putin. 
 * ISISball - DU ÄR EN ELAK IDIOT SOM JAG INTE VILL VARA MED. DU KAN ALDRIG VARA SNÄLL. DU VILL BARA DÖDA ALLA SOM ÄR TREVLIGA. YOU ARE THE REAL DEFINITION OF PURE EVILNESS YOU DONT EVEN HAVE A BRAIN TO THINK WITH.

Family
Sweden is a part of the big Nordic family. Some are brothers, some are adoptive brothers, some are nephews, and some are sisters and adoptive sisters.

Parents/Guardians

 * Germaniaball - Grandfather
 * Kalmar Unionball - Father
 * Holy Roman Empireball - Uncle

Spouse

 * Thailandball - Wife
 * Laosball - Brother-in-law

Siblings

 * Denmarkball - Brother
 * Icelandball - Brother
 * Norwayball - Brother
 * Finlandball - Adoptive Brother
 * Estoniaball - Sister-in-law (YOU CANNOT INTO NORDIC!!)

Cousins

 * Austriaball - Cousin
 * Germanyball - Cousin
 * Franceball - Cousin-in-law
 * Liechtensteinball - Cousin
 * Netherlandsball - Cousin
 * Switzerlandball - Cousin
 * UKball - Cousin

Children

 * Ålandball - Daughter/Adoptive Niece

Nephews/Nieces

 * Faroe Islandsball - Nephew (Formerly Norway's)
 * Greenlandball - Nephew
 * Svalbardball - Nephew
 * Kareliaball - Adoptive Niece
 * EUball - Nephew
 * Belgiumball - Nephew
 * Luxembourgball - Nephew
 * Surinameball - Nephew
 * Australiaball - Nephew
 * Belizeball - Nephew
 * Canadaball - Nephew
 * Guyanaball - Nephew
 * New Zealandball - Nephew
 * USAball - Nephew
 * All of Netherlandsball's former colonies - Adoptive Nephews
 * All of UKball's former colonies - Adoptive Nephews

Fun Facts

 * Swedish wasn't Sweden's main language until 2009
 * You can't name your child 'IKEA' or 'Elvis' in Sweden
 * North Koreaball owes Sweden €300m for 1000 volvos he stole 40 years ago
 * Swedenball can into renewable energy. He has the power to turn garbage into electricity, and even buys garbage from Norwayball for energy
 * Sweden had a Charles VII, but no Charles I to VI
 * King Eric XIII became a pirate after he lost the throne
 * 89% of Swedes speak English as a second language
 * The official twitter account @Sweden is given to a random citizen to manage every week but now starting on September 30th will be the last ever post as Curators of Sweden ends
 * He can into European Union (EU), but is not in  NATO

Links:

 * Fåceböök påge

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