New Zealandball

''"Wanna chip bro?" ''- New Zealandball New Zealandball is a countryball southeast of Australiaball. He is the son and former colony of UKball and the brother of Australiaball, Canadaball, and USAball. He has a pet kiwi and is known for the Lord of the Rings film and being the Adventure Capital of the World, he has 3 children, Niue, Tokelau, and the Cook Islands. Even though New Zealand is known for being a peaceful, caring nation, he can be a fierce warrior and a sheep shager. So if you mess with him, he will drop you. He is one of UKball's favorite former-colonies. However UK despises his sheep, the fact he respects minorities, and gives his natives (Maoriball) rights. He often gets mixed up with Australiaball. He planned to change his flag but people prefered the original flag. He likes giving his places long names, including the longest place name in the world: Taumata­whakatangihanga­koauau­o­tamatea­turi­pukakapiki­maunga­horo­nuku­pokai­whenua kitanatahuball, with 97 letters, beating Walesball's 58 letter name Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogochball to become the longest place name in the world.

Pre Colonization
Some time in the 12th century, the Maori, the first inhabitants of New ZealandBall, lived on a series of small islands called PolynesiaBall after sailing from Africa. Unfortunately, they began to run low on food supplies and set sail in search of new land, and after months of sailing they landed on what was the coast of New Zealand. They decided to settle down on this land for what they looked like a big cloud. They thought it was a good omen, so they everntually settled down there, and took care for its natural beauty and resources. They collected fruit, fishing, and hunting large birds. Later on, they started to grow vegetables. by 1500, the Maoris became very warlike. They prayed to their dead ancestors, since they thought some of them are sacred. These sacred people are called "tapu", or taboo.

European arrival
In 1642 Netherlandsball was sailing across the Pacific Ocean, when he sighted land, but before he came ashore he was attacked by Maoriball and quickly left. In 1769 Englandball landed on shore and made peaceful contact with Maoriball, and after that the French arrived. New Zealand's had rich resources, so he sold wood for ships and garden produce in trade for muskets which unfortunately broke out in many musket wars between Maori tribes.

Colonization
In the 18th century, UKball was getting quite worried about the land he had taken from the Maori and the fear Franceball might annex New Zealand, so in 1840 he got Maoriball to sign the Treaty of Waitangi which gave him full control of New Zealand and also made it compulsory for New Zealand to fight alongside UKball. New Zealandball was born. He then proved to UKball his loyalty to him by helping him fight South Africa in the boer war, and UKball was very impressed with how well he was fighting. NZ did feel good for helping his dad, but was heartbroken over the fact that the UK made him burn the South African villages and farms, and was very sympathetic towards them. He also was the first to reach the summit of Mt Everest with Nepal, one of his proudest achievement.

World War I
As soon as Britain declared war on German Empireball, New Zealandball found himself fighting in Europe. In 1915 New Zealandball teamed with his brother Australiaball to form the ANZACS, and went to war against Ottoman Empireball. Unfortunately on the day of attack he landed on the wrong beach and was shot.

Nuclear-Free New Zealand
So, in the Second World War when USA was getting ready to fight the Japanese Empire, NZ let him stay on his clay in return for protection from Japan. USA and NZ became good friends because of this. Then in the late 1950's USA started testing nukes in the Pacific near NZ, which led to other countries such as Britain and France to start testing nukes around that area. New Zealand went ballistic-fucking-ape-shit over the fact that they were destroying the small islands living in the Pacific Ocean, and successfully stopped testing of nuclear weapons in the Pacific. Now, France was pissed about this and decided to blow up the ship that was responsible for this. The Rainbow Warrior. France blew up the ship and New Zealand was deeply saddened to see his beautiful ship bombed. He then took France to court and forced him to pay 10 million dollars, banned all nuclear ships from entering NZ docks, much to USA's dismay as he tried to dock his nuclear subs and was forced away every single time.

Friends
New Zealand is a multi-cultural country, so unless you piss me off, you're a friend. But here are some of my best mates.
 * Anglos - The Anglo countryballs are muh maaates.
 * [[File:UK-icon.png]] UKball - My father. I share some cultural history with the old fart, but I now have a unique cultural identity and accent. Also the bloody Pom who can't play rugby to save his life. However he loves me for keeping my Union Jack, and my loyalty to him.
 * [[File:Australia-icon.png]] Australiaball - My more outstanding brother, we have a sibling rivalry. However, we fought together as the Anzac's in World War I. Bowls like a bloody idiot, I WILL NEVER FORGET 1981! I still love him dearly though.
 * [[File:Canada-icon.png]] Canadaball - We both say 'eh', but Canadaball is more stereotyped for it. We are both overshadowed by our brothers, and we both share being equally nice! Except for when i'm drunk.
 * [[File:USA-icon.png]] USAball - The shining star of the siblings. I had good trade with USA, but after I refused to let him park his nuclear ships in my waters, he hasn't been talking to me that much.
 * [[File:Maori-icon.png]] Maoriball - I maintain a peaceful relationship with my native inhabitants. This is probably why he is irrelevant, aside from his geographic location. 7% of New Zealandball speaks Maori, while 90% speak English.
 * [[File:English-icon.png]] Commonwealthball - Who is that bloke again?
 * [[File:Micronesia-icon.png]] Micronesiaball - I own most of your islands
 * [[File:South Korea-icon.png]] South Koreaball - Good friends with them. Apparently he is a sworn enemy with North Koreaball, so South Koreaball is our friend.
 * [[File:Netherlands-icon.png]] Netherlandsball - was the first explorers of my clay, and also gave me my name! Until the Maori killed him for some reason.
 * [[File:Chile-icon.png]] Chileball - Gave wheat during gold rush.
 * [[File:India-icon.png]] Indiaball - Makes good curry, top s***.
 * [[File:South Africa-icon.png]] South Africaball - Me and him had a fight about his apartheid, but we're on good terms. Probably the only one who is a challenge to beat in rugby.
 * [[File:England-icon.png]] Englandball - Won't admit i'm better at rugby & cricket.
 * [[File:Wales-icon.png]] Walesball - Probably the only person who understands sheep like I do.
 * [[File:Germany-icon.png]] Germanyball - Once I found and built a bike in my garage and won the Daytona! The Krauts face when a bike I built from parts I found in a dump beat his "superior German engineering"!
 * Sealandball - water locked little brother

C****/Enemies

 * [[File:North Korea-icon.png]] North Koreaball - Apparently they read The Crysalids novel, realized New Zealand (erroneously Sealand) still exists after a nuclear holocaust, and threaten New Zealand with a nuclear strike.
 * [[File:France-icon.png]] Franceball - The French detonated several nuclear bombs near New Zealand, and sanctioned the bombing of the Rainbow Warrior, a peaceful Greenpeace ship. They're on good terms today, but New Zealandball is still a bit grumbly.
 * [[File:Bosnia-icon.png]] Bosnia and Herzegovinaball - HOW DARE U TELL TOKELAUBALL TO GO CHANGE HIS FLAG
 * [[File:Japanese-Empire-icon.png]] Japanese Empireball - F*** you c***! If you even dare bomb my beautiful clay I will f****** come over there and shove the biggest piece of- wait he's dead now?
 * [[File:Ottoman-icon.png]] Ottoman Empireball - Look mate, I pretty much only fought against you because I was dumped into that war. And also because my dad thinks he can beat everything by throwing countries at it.

Stereotypes
One stereotype of New Zealand is that it doesn't exist. New Zealand is a country that is routinely distorted on maps, often being situated on one certain corner, or occasionally not situated anywhere at all.

One stereotype is that New Zealand is 'where men are men, and so are the women'. For being masculine.

Another is that New Zealand speaks a strange language.

New Zealand is stereotyped for being the best in the world at rugby. And why wouldn't we be? We won the world cup three times!

Lord of the Rings. Enough said.

New Zealand is also known for being the reason that the small islands are not being annexed, in fact New Zealand pretty much decide whether they live or die, as he is one of the country's that actually give a shit about them.

Links

 * Facebook page