Italyball

Italyball
: Repubblica Italianapalla

←

2 June, 1946 - Present

Mamma Mia! (followed by Italian gibberish)

General information

Government

Unitary Parliamentary Constitutional Republic

Personality

Friendly, romantic, noisy, religious, pragmatic, traditionalist and ANGRY, Neutral Evil, hot tempered

Language

Official Language:

Italian

Minority Languages:

Albanian

Catalan

German

Greek

Slovene

French

Franco-Provencal

Friulian

Ladin

Occitan

Romanian

Sardinian

Historic Language:

Latin

G7

G8

G10

NATOball

OECDball

UNball

Union for the Mediterraneanball

Religion

Christianity

Catholicism (majority)
Orthodoxy (minority)
Protestantism (minority)

Atheism

Islam (minority)

Sikhism (minority)

Hinduism (minority)

Hellenism (very small minority)

Relations and opinions

Friends

Vaticanball

Sovereign Military Order of Maltaball

Tunisiaball (sometimes)

Philippinesball (sometimes)

My only Nordic friend

Japanball (Usually)

Hungaryball

San Marinoball

Maltaball

Austriaball(sometimes)

Franceball(sometimes)

Monacoball

Sloveniaball(sometimes)

Turkeyball

Canadaball

Germanyball(sometimes)

Swedenball(sometimes because of Marzia)

Likes

🍕 Pizza, 🍝 pasta, 🍷 wine, lasagne,

Catholicism,

good old days,

encl aves

, ⚽️ soccer, 🏀 Basketball, Rugby 🏈, corruption, Christopher Columbus, Columbus day, Tarantella Napolitana, 🦍 Festival della canzone italiana di Sanremo, Lacuna Coil, Gigi D'Agostino, Benny Benassi, Mario Balotelli, Gianluigi Buffon, Santino Marella,

Donald Trump, Matteo Salvini, Silvio Berlusconi, Winx Club, W.I.T.C.H. (I created the comics and Franceball created this show until USAball thinks it was owned by Disney), 🎶 the song We No Speak Americano, 🎶 Nel Blu Dipinto Di Blu (aka Volare), 🎶 Blue (Da Ba Dee), Leonardo da Vinci, Bruno Sammartino (greatest wrestler in the world!), Fausto Coppi, Gino Bartali, Marco Pantani (RIP), Michael Schumacher, Nutella, Michelangelo, Ferrero, Style, Salami, 🌶 hot pepper everywhere, 🚗 luxury cars, Ferrari, Lamborghini, Pagani, Scooters, Prosciutto, Shoving Hot Peppers in enemy's face, Getting pissed off, Il Giro, Super Mario Bros. (no matter how much he tries to deny it), Giuseppe Conte, Polaretti, 👗👢Italian fashion brands (Armani, Gucci, Dolce & Gabbana, Prada, Max Mara, Miu Miu, Off-White, Versace, etc.), CutiePieMarzia {Congrats on the wedding!}, Being fashionable when it comes to Milanball, Ducati, Bellini, Vespa

Dislikes

Kebab Terrorists, mafioso, Zidane's headbutt, Padaniaball, earthquakes, economic problems, France claiming her food is better, getting told to calm down, ~~Bowser~~ introverts, people doing bad Italian accents, being called a

P I G S, creepypasta, Paul brothers, when someone touches his spaghetti, Angela Merkel ,Emmanuel Macron~~(and also Merkelreich)~~, NGOs, economic migrants, migrant smuggling, Lewis Hamilton, ~~Wario~~ pizza with pineapple, ~~Waluigi~~

Historical information
Preceded by
Fascist Italyball

Is of importants

Can into space?

Yes

Börk

Ital ital / Pizza pizza / Pasta pasta / Mamma Mia, Mamma Mia / Bella ciao, bella ciao

Food

Pizza (BUT NOT STUFFED-CRUST PEPPERONI, DEEP DISH AND ESPECIALLY NOT PIZZA BURGERS), pasta (spaghetti, bolognese, carbonara, lasagne, ravioli etc.), coffee (but no takeaway/Starbucks), gelato, tiramisù, mozzarella, Nutella & go con EstaTHÉ, caffè espresso, hot pepper, calzone, gnocchi...

Status

Of fightings in

Indiaball elections in 2019.

Notes

I’ll STUFF YOU ALL IN THE CRUST IF YOU TRY GIBING ME STUFFED CRUST PEPPERONI! ALSO, I HATE LITHUANIA BECAUSE OF KETCHUP ON A PIZZA!

“	Pizza, pasta, mamma mia	”
	— Italian stereotypes

“	Well, he's a good cook, I guess, but its not BBQ.	”
	— Texasball

“	That's a spicy meat-a-ball	”
	— The Mask

“	Its-a-me. Mario!	”
	— Mario

Italyball is a countryball in Europe, and the favorite grandchild of SPQRball ~~(one day return the empire!)~~. Italyball appears in a lot of the polandball comics, Often with Vaticanball and San Marinoball on his head. It is always celebrating his culture, art, history and other "beautiful" things ... but it hates very much when people think he is only pizza and pasta. He thinks they should know more. ~~Also is the land of the Mario brothers.~~ Italy is the 71st largest country, and as of 2019, it has a population of 60.52 million inhabitants.

Italy is a great power and a weak nation, which is one of the world's unsolved mysteries. It is a member of the G20 (or Group of Twenty) and of the G7 (or Group of seven). Italyball is friend with both Russiaball (Italyball: stop with this thing of Third Rome) and USAball (Italyball: stop trying to be a wannabe Roman Empire too).

Italyball was the host of the two FIFA World Cups: the first time in 1934 and the second time in 1990. Italy can into space along with ESAball and can into Nukes along with NATOball.

His national day is June 2.

One important thing to know about Italyball is he hates any pizza recipe that is not his own.

History

Unification (1848-1871)

The Italian stateballs had been divided for centuries since the fall of the glorious SPQRball in 476 AD, but only after the Enlightenment and subsequent Napoleonic Wars, did a sense of Italian nationalism and unity begin growing amongst the Italian Stateballs, particularly after the Revolutions of 1848 which rocked the European continent. In 1859, Kingdom of Sardiniaball annexed many of the Northern Italian Stateballs, such as Tuscanyball, Modenaball, Massaball and Parmaball. He then fought a war against Austrian Empireball Habsburgball with the help of Franceball to liberate Lombardia, in exchange for giving Nice and Savoy to Franceball.

Then in 1860, Sardiniaball led his Redshirts' Expedition of the Thousand to Two Siciliesball's clay, which was then forced to join the new union, leading to Sardiniaball to proclaim himself as Kingdom of Italyball in 1861. He then set about reclaiming 'Italia Irredenta' (Unredeemed Italy). In 1866, he teamed up with Prussiaball against Habsburgball again, gaining Venice from Franceball, who had obtained it from Austrian Empireball directly. Then Italyball turned on Franceball's ally Papal Statesball while Franceball was distracted by the North German stateballs during the Franco-Prussian war of 1870-71. Rome was 'liberated' by Italyball, and became the new capital, with Papal Statesball protesting vehemently.

Italia Irredenta! (1871-1915)

Throughout the 1870s and 1880s, Italyball worked to secure diplomatic ties with his neighbors; in 1882 he signed an alliance with German Empireball and Austria-Hungaryball despite their differences over the Adriatic lands, then he signed a naval agreement with UKball in 1887 regarding Mediterranean passage. He also colonized East Africa in 1889, adopting Italian Eritreaball and Italian Somalilandball. He was however beaten to the punch by Franceball who took Tunisiaball in 1881 before he could. He was, however shamefully defeated at the Battle of Adawa in 1896 by Ethiopiaball.

By 1900 Italyball had established himself as a world power; taking part in the 1897 Cretan expedition, and the international relief expedition of 1900 during the Boxer Rebellion. In 1908, Austria-Hungaryball annexed Bosnia-Herzegovina outright from a dying Ottoman Empireball, causing Italyball to declare war for the Dodecanese Islands, and Cyrenaciaball (now Libyaball) and his clay in 1911-12. He stayed neutral for the first few months of the Great War when it broke out in August 1914, because German Empireball and Austria-Hungaryball were the aggressors, but the Allies convinced Italyball to join them in 1915 with promises of Dalmatia, Trentino, Istria, and colonies.

Viva Il Duce! (1915-1939)

Italyball fought hard against Austria-Hungaryball, with whom he was evenly matched in the Julian Alps, but was defeated at Caporetto in 1917, but triumphed at Vittorio Veneto in 1918, shortly after which Austria-Hungaryball signed an armistice at Vila Gusti. Italyball had been bankrupted by the war, and turned briefly towards socialism when he didn't get all he was expecting at the Peace Conference (he got only Trentino, Trieste, Istria, Fiume and Zadar). In 1922 he became fascist and Marched on Rome; it took until 1925 for him to completely abandon democracy. In the 1920s, he pioneered aviation, and took part in pacifying a colonial uprising in Libya; in 1929 he signed the Lateran Pact with the new Vatican City and in the 1930s, he began building up a vast armaments industry in preparation for war, as he had to prevent the newly Nazified Nazi Germanyball from Anschlussing Austriaball in 1934.

In 1934, following border clashes at Wal-Wal, Italyball manufactured a casus-belli for war against Abyssiniaball ( Ethiopiaball) despite a mutual 1928 non-aggression pact. He invaded in 1935, using poison gas and bombers to massacre 8balls, eventually annexing their clay to create Italian East Africaball. This led to international outrage, and League of Nationsball condemned Italyball's actions by introducing half-hearted economic sanctions. Italyball left the League and abandoned the democracies ( UKball and Franceball) in response, to formulate an alliance with Nazi Germanyball, aligning themselves in the 1936 Anti-Comintern Pact and Rome-Berlin Axis. They were further drawn into each other by their assistance of Nationalist Spainball in the Spanish Civil War (1936-39), and the lack of Italyball's criticism of Nazi Germanyball's remilitarization of the Rhinelands, then his Anschluss of Austriaball successfully conducted in March 1938. He stood by his new ally in the Czech crisis of September 1938. Nazi Germanyball pressured his friend into adopting racial laws against Jewcubes in 1938 as well.

Disastrous Warfare (1939-1947)

In March 1939, Italyball Invaded Albaniaball's clay, who had been his protectorate since 1926. He then signed the Pact of Steel with Nazi Germanyball; however he was left shocked when Nazi Germanyball signed a non-aggression pact with their mortal enemy Soviet Unionball, and even more so when they invaded Polandball jointly in September 1939. Italyball again stayed neutral for the first stretch of the war, but after seeing Nazi Germanyball's blitzkrieg through Western Europe and the fall of Franceball in mid 1940, Italyball jumped in half-preparedly; resulting in him getting his ass handed to him by Franceball even when he was capitulating. Italyball got to occupy parts of Vichy Franceball's clay afterwards, though he got his ass kicked by Greeceball in November 1940 when he tried to invade, resulting in Nazi Germanyball having to come bail him out the following year with a Balkan campaign. Italy occupied most of Greece, and some of the southern Balkans afterwards. UKball had also bombed his fleet at Taranto.

Meanwhile, in 1941 UKball and Free Franceball had liberated Abyssinia in East Africa, and occupied his colonies there, as well as in Libya. His forces were hopeless in North Africa until Nazi Germanyball sent his panzers to help him out; then he was forced to send his troops to help invade Sovietball's vast clay. Then USAball and UKball kicked them out of North Africa altogether, and even landed in Sardinia and Sicily by mid 1943, pushing up into Campania. At this point, Italyball had spent his resources, and was tired of the war; he dropped fascism in the coup of 25 Luglio 1943, and signed an armistice, but then Nazi Germanyball occupied the north of his clay and created a puppet state, Italian Social Republicball to continue the war as the Allies struggled up the Italian peninsula, with battles at Monte Cassio. Rome was liberated in mid 1944; but Italian Social Republicball kept fighting until the surrender of Nazi Germanyball in May 1945.

After the disaster of the war, which had wrecked Italyball's clay and industry, he decided to dispose of the monarchy in a referendum in 1947, after having lost his colonies and having to pay reparations. So, in 1947, The Kingdom of Italy became a Republic.

Modern Era (1947- present)

Italyball, after becoming a republic by popular referendum in 1947, started rebuilding his economy and industry based on loans from the Marshall Plan. He narrowly avoided a socialist victory in the elections, and became affiliated with USAball, NATOball and against Sovietball. He was forced to give up all his colonies to UKball, Franceball and Ethiopiaball except Italian Somalilandball; and he had to give up Albaniaball, the Dalmatian coastline, and some of Istria to Yugoslaviaball. He also had to pay reparations, and was prohibited from owning heavy duty military machines for some time.

In 1951, Italyball was invited to join the European Coal and Steel Community, which developed into the EEC in 1956/7 via the Treaty of Rome, with Franceball, West Germanyball and the Be Ne Lux balls. In 1960 he gave Somaliaball his independence; then he allowed USAball to place strategic missiles on his clay during the Cold War (the Jupiter Missiles). Those were removed following the Cuban Missile Crisis in 1962. He also got rid of Mafia activities in the 1970s. In late 1960s began a bad time for Italy. The Years of lead were a terroristic period in which many people died by mortal attempts.

Italyball developed a modern economy in the 1970s and 1980s, producing luxury brands like Ferrari. He joined the EU in 1993 as a founding member of the EEC after the Maastricht Treaty, and nowadays he partakes in only some coalitions to keep peace in the Middle East under NATOball. He is a member of the G20 & G7, and the fourth most developed EU member (third after Brexit). He now spends his time producing luxury sunglasses, good food, and patrolling the southern coast to keep a lookout for 8-ball and Middle Eastern refugees.

Together with his sisters Franceball and Spainball, they host the three Grand Tours of professional cycling. Italyball proudly hosts the Giro d'Italia every May (his sisters host the Tour and the Vuelta respectively).

In August 14 of 2019, An Italian YouTuber named CutiePie, Married the most famous man on YouTube, PewDiePie. They married in London,United Kingdom. It gained a million views in 1 day. Peopel from Sweden and Italy rejoice

Flag Colour

	RGB	CMYK	HEX
Green	0,146,70	1.0000, 0.0000, 0.5205, 0.4275	#009246
White	255,255,255	N/A	#ffffff
Red	206,43,55	C5-M94-Y99-K1	#ce2b37

Personality

Italyball tries to be friends with everyone except people of different races like 8ball or EVIL kebab, despite his tries of being friendly with everyone he still has some resemblances of him during the fascist era and sometimes this causes some troubles, he doesn't seem to care about most things but is very serious about irredentism and taking back all the stolen lands from Croatiaball (Istriaball and Dalmatiaball) and Franceball (Savoyball, Niceball and especially Corsicaball) (who loves him in return as she loves every beautiful things).

He's normally calm and relaxed but when his fascist counterpart takes his place he becomes very violent and forces everyone who uses the communistic "u" instead of the Latin "v" to drink the so called "Olio di Ricino" used by him to torture communists during the fascist era. His favorite comic hero is Dr. Fascio, a fascist propaganda comic about a bolsheviks-killing doctor. He's very mad if someone insults his favorite football team, so mad that he can even send everyone to the hospital (Italyball: Of course I am violent, I have blood of Roman legionaries in the veins!!! Capiche!!!) He does not like it when people think that all he does is eat pizza and pasta! he drinks wine too

How to draw

Draw the basic circle shape and divide it into three vertical stripes.
Colour the stripes respectively of these colours: green, white, red
Add eyes and you've finished

Relations

Amici/Alleati (Friends/Allies)

Argentinaball - I had with Spainball. His president is of my ancestry, also pope.
Brazilball - Gib your father and uncles som monies plox. He liberated me in WW2 with USAball.
Donald Trump - He had praised my prime minister. We thank you so much! We both hate the 4th Reich.
Greeceball - Lets take monies from Germanyball.
Hungaryball - Another countryball that hates the 4th Reich. Plox change your flag.
Indonesiaball - Vatican love him so much... (Even though he is a Kebab), He also say my food is better than Escargot, TAKE THAT FRANCEBALL!!!!
Albaniaball - IS MY BEST FRIEND! but... WHY SO MANY ALBANIANS IN MY COUNTRY?! Io steel love you my pervert kind of Muslim broh-
Polandball - Marsz marsz Dąbrowski, z ziemi włoskiej do Polski! Happy 100th birthday!
Romaniaball - Brother and good friend. We have a good relation. We are corrupt but we have the best food. He likes pizza, I like mititei.But STOP of likings 4th Reich,he doesn't even let you have Euro like me(I don't need this German currency).
Russiaball - He is good friends with my brother. We both hate the debt collector and the 4th Reich.
San Marinoball - You are rightful Italia clay! We're also like brothers, ~~BUT VATICANBALL IS THE ONLY ONE THAT ACTUALLY LIKES YOU~~.
Somaliaball - Son. We have some common enem ies.
Spainball - Good friend, I totally understand her language, both have serious economic problems, we must take back money with Portugalball
UKball - We're on good terms. Both of us have rivalry with France. Has bad food reputation that makes us look even better. ~~You were totally right about EUball.~~ ~~BUT SCHUMI BETTER DRIVER THAN HAMILTON!~~
Vaticanball - Home of Catholics. We used to have hate. Now he's like my little brother (literally). He thinks my head is very comfortable and is always sitting there!
Sovereign Military Order of Maltaball - My Adoptive son who I took in and who has no clay but I still give him a few places to stay. He is of the very importance to me now and helps with military.
Finlandball - My only Nordic friend. We were Axis Powers during WW2. Now we are EUball members but he is not part of NATOball because of neutrality. Still good friends. ~~TAKE THAT LOS ERS!!!~~

Neutro (Neutral)

Austriaball - Good friend, but please get your troops off the border! And no, Io not gibbings South Tyrol back.
Canadaball - Good friend and there are many Italians in his clay. but HOW DARE YOU PUT PIECES OF PINEAPPLE ON PIZZA!!!!!!!!! YOU DESTROY SPIRIT OF PIZZA!!!!!!!! IT'S WORSE THAN PEPPERONI!!!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOO!!! YOU WORSE THAN AMERICA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I DECLARE WAR ON BAD PIZZA MAKERS!
Croatiabal - Another thief, but still a slavic friend. You did really well in the World Cup.
Franceball - Mia sorella. We both have lots of history and we are in NATO and EU. BUT MY FOOD IS BETTER!!!!! Also just because Mona Lisa is in your museum doesn't mean it's yours. In fact IT'S MINE, LEONARD DA VINCI WAS ITALIAN!!!!! She's also my football rival, I beat her in 1938,1978 and 2006 world cups, but NEVER FORGET 1986,1998 SEMI-FINAL AND EURO 2000 FINAL! Also stop being so arrogant and bossy! ~~Also can you gibs Niceball, Savoyball and Corsicaball, please?~~
Belgiumball - Similar to Franceball. MY FOOD IS BETTER!!! REMOVE FRENCH FRIES ~~WHICH IS NOT FRENCH NOR BELGIAN BUT ITALIAN~~!!! REMOVE WAFFLES!!! REMOVE CHOCOLATE!!! Also, remember Marcinelle!
Philippinesball - My Asian nephew, he loves my food and cartoons. BUT WHAT KIND OF SPAGHETTI IS THIS?! REMOVE JOLLIBEE!!! I DECLARE WAR ON BAD PASTA MAKERS!. Also ONE OF HIS RELIGIOUS CULT STOLE MY FLAG! @!!!!!!!
- : What is wrong with you, tito?! You hate me just because I opened a Jollibee branch in Milanball and now you will declare war against me?! You are so sensitive when it comes to your food! Even Canadaball love Jollibee so much! It is MY version of spaghetti! You think?! You hate my uncle Canada for pineapple on pizza, Sweden for ketchup and pizza and Lithuania for the same thing just because you were been triggered of Italian food mistakes because of them!
Tunisiaball - Used to be enemies in the past, but we're getting along with each other and i´m teaching him how make pizza and sometimes he calls me for daddy. Sometimes I get angry at him for claiming that Malta is his ~~SISTER~~ Brother, Sending me refugees and arguing about Pantelleriaball and Sicilyball belongs to him. I will give you Pantelleria if you only tell your sister that I'm her real father.
USAball - I am in his NATOball alliance, and there are many Italians who immigrated to him. I wish you good luck with your new president. ~~(BUT I DON'T SOUND LIKE WHAT YOU THINK I DO SO STOP TRYING YOU FUCKING REAPER! ONE DAY I WILL GET BACK MY SOVERGINITY YOU SON OF A BITCH!)~~ Also that "thing" yuo make that yuo call pizza IS NOT PIZZA! I DECLARE WAR ON BAD PIZZA MAKERS!
- : You do realize that American pizza is invented by "Italian-Americans" so what you are saying is hypocritical.
Japanball - We were Axis Powers and are currently allies, and I am huge fan of his cartoons - specialmente Lupin III. BUT WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR GAME! I DON'T TALK LIKE THAT! REMOVE SUPER MARIO BROS! ~~MAMMA MIA!~~

Nemici (Enemies)

EUball AKA 4^thReich - BASTARD SON OF BAGUETTE AND BEER WHO TREATS ME AND INSISTS ME WHEN I CLOSE PORTS FROM IMMIGRANTS, ME, A RACIST??? HOHOHOHO REALLY??? SAYS WHO MADE THE 4TH GERMAN REICH, NOW I GOT A BETTER GOVERNMENT AND YOU COMPLAIN??!! I AM GONNA LEAVE BAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! I'M NOT A P I G S!!! He also called me the most corrupt country in Europe.
Indiaball - Why aren't you voting my son Pappu in your next elections? I will be very happy and REMOVE MODIIIIIII!!! Look my son will rule you BAHAHAHAHAHA!!! LET COME 2019!!! REMOVE T-SERIES!!!
Bangladeshball - Stop coming and scamming my tourists, they will want to stop coming, and don't force things into people's hands or else I will remove you
Egyptball - TELL NOI THE TRUTH SU REGENI! (I'm looking at you, UK)
Ethiopiaball - Because I tried to colonize him, he hates me, and he is my son...
- : I am not your son!!! I am the beginning of everything!!! ባቲክን ይንቁ, ፓስታን ይዝጉ!!! I am several millennia older than you!!! I EVEN KNOW YOUR FATHER SPQRBALL!!! I'm the Cradle of Humanity!!!
- : Salve, Aethiopia...Surprise imperium?
- : Ethiopiaball ሽንት ...
Germanyball - Traitor! Gib Monies! We used to be Axis Powers and now we are EUball and NATOball members but debt is how you repay me? Fuck off! I will leave the 4th Reich! HAHAHAHAHA! Rome shall rise again ~~But grazie mille for Schumi e Vettel.~~

Mexicoball - FLAG STEALER!!!!! Yet you can into Catholic
Sloveniaball - Melania Trump your husband is a idiot like my Prime Minister so nope, no access to my country! TRIESTE IS AND WILL ALWAYS BE MINE!!! YOU HEAR THAT?! MINE!!!
South Koreaball - Stupid thieves (we remember 2002 World Cup!!!!! Unforgivable!!!) REMOVE KPOP!!! Though you beat Germany in 2018 World Cup; I forgive you but will not forget!
Swedenball - NON MI PIACI!!! Could not into World Cup 2018 because of voi, REMOVE BÖRK!!! (Mia sorella Francia got her revenge for both of noi via Englandball) And he eats PASTA WITH KETCHUP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND PIZZA WITH BANANA TOPPING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH DIO!!!!!!!!!!!! I DECLARE WAR ON BAD PASTA AND PIZZA MAKERS! REMOVE PEWDIEPIE!!! ~~but Pewdiepie and Cutiepiemarzia are partners tho~~. Hahahahah I beat you for the 2026 winter olympics! Take that Sweden!
Netherlandsball - YOU OF BEATINGS ME IN EUROVISION SONG CONTEST!!! MAHMOOD IS MILLION TIMES BETTER THAN DUNCAN LAURENCE! REMOVE WEED!!!
Norwayball - Swedenball's brother. CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS WAS THE FIRST TO EXPLORE NORTH AMERICA!!! NOT LEIF ERIKSON!!! REMOVE GRANDIOSA PIZZA!!!
Uruguayball - You of biting me and make me lose on world cup, I will report you to UNball if you of biting me again.
New York Cityball - PIZZA STEALER!!! ~~But Italian is the 2nd most spoken language after English.~~

Lithuaniaball - WTF?! He eats PIZZA WITH KETCHUP!!! OH DIO!!!!!!!!!!!! I DECLARE WAR ON BAD PIZZA MAKERS!

ISISball - Everyone hates him, me too, SO REMOVE THIS SMELLY JIHAD!!!!!!!!!
Everyone who remixes Bella Ciao and plays it on night clubs - Why? How dare you use a patriotic song for fun? How would you feel if I used the Star-Spangled Banner as a birthday song?