|“||Heyyy... said the Roman Empire, eating up all the Mediterranean for breakfast||”|
Ancient Romeball, also known as Roman Empireball, SPQRball, Roman Republicball (until 27 BC) and Roman Kingdomball (until 503 BC) was the mightiest Classical Age Empire in Europe and arguably the world.
The history of the Ancient Romeball spans a very long time from 753 BC to 476 AD. That's 1229 years. As such, Ancient Romeball was one of the longest lasting empires in history. There are countless battles and wars that were waged. Political intrigue, tales of heroism, romance and betrayal.
The Roman Empireball was one of the largest empires in history on Earthball. Roman Empire spanned an incredible 5 million square kilometers at its zenith in 117 AD. It covered most of Europe, North-Africa and the Middle-East. The Roman Empire was the only country in history that completely controlled the Mediterranean Sea and all the coastal areas around it. They called it Mare Nostrum ("Our Sea").
Travel was very slow on horses and carriages. So it took months to travel from one end to the other side of Romeball. Its capital city was Rome. There's a saying "all roads lead to Rome", because the roads radiated outward from Rome into Europe.
The cultural and technological achievements of Ancient Romeball were one of the greatest in antiquity and human history. It build breathtaking cities with colloseums , Roman aquaducts , amphitheatre. Its de facto official language was Latin. When Romeball conquered Ancient Greeceball it incorporated much of its culture such as art, painting, sculture, historiography, parts of its religion.
Romanball liked various kinds of entertainment. Most notable are gladiator armed combat in Colloseums to entertain the Roman audiences. Most gladiators were slaves and schooled under harsh conditions. The battles were often between gladiators, animals and convicted criminals.
Romeball had many different Emperors. Some were kind hearted and others ruthless and corrupt. The most famous are Emperor Augustus and Julius Ceasar. There are a great many tales about their lives and actions.
Romeball was admired and feared by its enemies. It had one of the finest, well equiped and most disciplined military forces in antiquity. They protected its borders and kept order in its diverse society. Ancient Romeball beat most of the barbarians it encountered and incorporated them into its glorious empire. After defeating its biggest rival Carthageball, it became the uncontested ruler of the Mediterranean Sea and all the surrounding land.
It despised the uncivilized barbarians outside its long borders. When Ancient Romeball conquered new lands it added millions of slaves and citizens to the empire. This made the population very diverse. The social struture was very rigid. It was based on heredity, property, wealth, citizenship and freedom. There was a pathway to becoming a Roman citizen, but it had to be earned.
The Imperial Roman army was one of the best in Antiquity. but it weakened after numerous succession crises and foreign invasions and in the end, they weren't able to defend against people with pointy sticks. Thereafter it disintegrated, but continued as the Western Roman Empire and the Eastern Roman Empire.
Ancient Romanball doesn't exist anymore, but it has an everlasting legacy that influenced western civilization. Many countries still speak Latin related languages. Many Roman ruins are still in South Europe and some parts of the Middle-East near the Mediterranean Sea. Italyball and the capital of Rome still has many thousands year old ruins of the once glorious Roman Empire. For example the Colloseum and Amphitheare and the Pantheon .
The Roman ""Mythology"" & Foundation (source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9EOzr15h8S8)
Dark Ages & Trojan Wars
There once was a dream... A dream to purge to this rotten world from the barbarians whom infest it. A dream, called "Rome"... Thousands of years ago, the world lived in a dark age. Europe, like the rest, was a complete shithole with barbarians of all breeds as far as one could see. Among these vile beasts were the Greeks, savage animals whom spent their existence killing, raping and shitting on each other. The gods were disgusted by what they saw, their solution was to start again. A new race was built, tailor made to be perfect resulting in the birth of the Trojans. Let loose in the middle of the Greek chaos, the Trojans set out to bring order to the place, inventing civilization with the founding of Troy, where they strove to answer the deepest questions of mankind. Physics, philosophy, economics. No matter the mystery, the Trojans mastered it. They were the pride of the Gods, attracting the collective envy of the Greeks. It culminated with the kidnapping of the Trojan Prince by a Greek queen, whom lusted after his perfect body. To salvage his position, the Greek king twisted events, tricking the Greek hordes it was Troy who wronged them. Easily fooled, the barbarians encircled Troy, numbering the hundreds of millions. It became known as the Trojan Wars, a series of catastrophic Greek failures. As always, the Greek's turned to divine intervention to achieve their foul goals... Taking advantage of Jupiter's fear of Troy's potential. (Either teleported by Jupiter into Troy or using a horse to trick them and fuck up the city) Once in Troy, the Greeks smelled the scent of civilization for the first time, and instinctively hated it. They did what it did best, killing, raping, and shitting without mercy. The rape of Troy would bring an end to civilization itself, were not for the unsung hero: Anchisis.
Anchisis never shared his people's kindness towards barbarians. The moment he first saw Greek, Anchisis knew peace would never last. Predicting the worst, Anchisis impregnated the godness of beauty using his Trojan charm. Resulting in the birth of the man, the myth, the legend himself... Aeneas Chadus Maximus. At the day of the sack, Aeneas woke up from the piles of women he was sleeping with storming out of his house and savagely slaughtering his way through the Greek hordes with nothing but his bare pp, all while carrying his father with one hand, and guiding the survivors with the other. The heroic act much impressed Jupiter. As an apology, he granted Aeneas the divine destiny to settle in their ancestral Italian lands, where their descendants were prophesized to save the world. And so, the dream of Rome was born.
Voyage to Rome
Aeneas braved the seas, easily defeating all gods and monsters who stood in his way, making a planned stop at Carthage for resupply. In it, Aeneas was faced against the greatest threat to a man's life. A thot. The thot queen of Carthage. In exchange for the needed supplies, she demanded Aeneas to satisfy her in bed every day for a year, which Aeneas honorably agreed, for the greater good. The debt paid, Aeneas set to return to his destiny. Dido could not accept his departure, but Aeneas insisted, knowing better than to fall prey to a thot. In her rage, Dido burned all his leftover belongings. Throwing herself into the fire, cursing their descendants to eternal rivalry. Dooming millions to die in the war to come. Historians still debate if her cruelty derived most from being a Punic, or a woman.
Aeneas in Italy
Escaping Carthage, Aeneas finally arrived in Italy. Becoming the king of Alba Longa, after quick trip to the underworld of his father, killing a barbarian warlord, and 69ing the local Trojan princess. With her, Aeneas was able to father a pure-blooded Trojan family. A chance unfortunately not granted to his men, leading to generations of miscegenation the years came and went, leaving Numitor, Aeneas' descendant to suffer from the consequences, being usurped by his bastard, half barbarian brother.
Aeneas, Romulus, and Remus in Alba Longa
Once again, civilization was on line to be destroyed by barbarian scum, this time off put by the birth of the legendary twins: Romulus and Remus. Lawful sons of Numitor's daughter, and the god Mars. The usurper was too much of a coward to kill them himself, much less in the front of the God of War, giving the twins for a servant to go drown in the Tiber River, having the princess assassinated while Mars wasn't looking. But the servant refused to commit the crime, his Trojan ancestry overpowering in the corruption from his barbarian side. Tiberinus, god of the Tiber took over from there, guiding the young lads to the care of a she-wolf. She raised them lovingly, granting them her wolf-like instincts with the power for canine milk, all until they were old enough to be adopted by shepherds. As true Trojan descendants, sons of Mars, fed by wolves, and raised by stoic shepherds, the twins grew to be great leaders. Having the admiration of the men, and the love of the woman, the twins were envied by the local barbarian incels. Incapable of competing in either strength, intellect, or beauty, the barbarians saught to employ their only field of advantage: Evil. One day, as Remus looked at the stars, pondering the big questions while resting from yet another 69, the barbarians ganged up on him. Capturing Remus threatening the girls if he tried to escape. Delivering him at the hands of the usurper, whom happily imprisoned him. Learning of the act through his wolf instincts, Aeneas was outraged. In response, he used his charisma to raise an army with his followers and seige Alba Longa. And despite unarmed and untrained, Romulus' forces shattered through the city's defenses, killing the usurper and freeing the hostages.
Foundation of Rome & Remus' Death
Claimed as heros, the twins were taught of their Trojan ancestry by their grandfather, whom named them the rightful kings of the city, an honor they refused. Instead, they set out to build a new city, gathering the last pure blooded Trojans with them, but no girls allowed. They used their wolf instincts to trace back to where their mummy wolf had raised them. Among those Seven Hills, history was about to be changed forever... but before it could, a rift had developed between the brothers. Romulus sought to follow on Troy steps, believing the barbarians could be peacefully negotiated with, but Remus, having suffered the most under barbaric crimes, he knew peace was impossible, fearing that if they follow the exact same path as Troy, they would suffer it's same fate. It was a source of great debate between the brothers, their different perspectives generating many disputes. As civilized men, they attempted to solve it with a bird-watching contest which resulted in a tie, due to the gods enjoying the drama of their conflict. At any rate, brothers agreed they at least needed a wall, for if there was one thing the local barbarians hated the most, was the smell of progress. While Romulus built the base of the walls, Remus built the top. As he did so, one of their followers climbed to the top with, nearing ever closer... Suddenly, he pushed Remus from the wall. Hearing the screams, Romulus was shocked, rushing to his brother's aid, finding him in fatal conditions. In his righteous anger, Romulus demanded an explanation, but once he looked closely, the explanation became clear. It was no Trojan, but a barbarian , seeking to do his part in destroying civilization forever. Romulus let him escape, choosing instead to stand by his brothers last dying moment. with his last breath, Romulus spoke one last time, naming the city of Rome, in honor of his brother, whom he named its first king. Drowned in sorrow, Romulus accepted, mercifully ending his brother's suffering. With this harsh lesson, Romulus finally understood Remus. There was no hope for peaceful coexistence, and so, not only had Rome to surpass Troy's greatness, but to spread it to the world, cleansing it of the barbarian plague whom sickened it. It was an inevitable war, between order, and chaos. The barbarians would go on to spread how Romulus murdered his brother for power, a lie most people still believe today, but at least you, my dearest pleb, knows the true history.
The Roman Monarchy & Republic
Ancient Romeball born as a kingdom ruled by Sabines and Etruscan kings. During this period, Ancient Romeball slowly conquered all Central Italy. After the last king got exiled from the city, Etruscanball got into a war against Ancient Romeball. The result was the acquisition of Etruria by the Romans. They learned a lot from these Etruscanballs: religious sacrifices, early Roman military structure, and even the toga - yeah, the Roman toga was an Etruscan invention.
Ancient Romeball, then, became a republic where two co-leaders were elected for a year only. During this period the various Punic Wars and the expansion against Gaulball lead Ancient Romeball to become the dominating power of the Ancient Known World. Illyriaball and Ancient Greeceball were annexed too during this period.
The Romans took a long time to conquer Ancient Greeceball, and in the process, the Romans adopted Greek painting, sculpture, philosophy, historiography, and even religion.
The Ancient Romeballs never became Greekballs though. There were things about the Ancient Romeballs that never changed: The Greekballs loved ideas, the Romeballs were practical, in what many historians call a "rustic Italian" way. If they learned something from the Greekballs, they figured out a way to turn it into something that could be useful to the Empire. Roads, aqueducts, arches, are all good examples.
The Romeballs did not try to spread Greek language in their Empire. They spread the Latin language. It was only in the already Hellenized East that they accepted the use of Greek, and this was mainly due to the existing tax collection systems created by the Hellenistic kingdomballs that had been conquered by them.
The Romeballs never saw Odysseus, Achilles or Heracles like their "mythological heroes". No, they chose Aneas, a demigod who was the enemy of the Greek mythologic heroes. Historically, the Romeballs saw themselves in many ways better than the Greekballs, and Aeneas was the perfect symbol for that supremacy.
Romeball defeated its biggest rival Carthageball in North-Africa at the Battle of Zama (201 BC) by Scipio Africanus. Thereafter it became the undisputed superpower of the lands around the Mediterranean Sea and much of the European continent and the Middle East. It also included Ancient Egyptball .
During the First Century BC, the republican government was highly corrupted and so the Principality was instituted after Julius Ceasar won the civil war.After Caesar defeated Pompey,he had encountred two empires: Daciaball and Parthiaball,who threastened his position. He had planned to invade these 2 empires but he was assassinated in 44 BC by a senate conspiracy. In 44 BC,Octavian became the Dictator of the Roman Republic and quickly defeated the Ptolemaic Egyptball in 30 BC. Octavian became "Imperator" (Emperor) in 27 BC and he took the name of Augustus, plus the Principality became known as Empire only after his death in 14 AD.
Meanwhile, Ancient Romeball managed to annex Herodiancube, Bosporan Kingdomball, Ancient Armeniaball, Daciaball (106 AD) and to partially defeat Parthiaball, and emperor Trajan helped the SPQRball to reach its height. After he died, Hadrian came to the throne and put the SPQRball's focus on defense. The SPQRball then stagnated.
But in the Third Century CE, SPQRball was pretty unstable and Sasanian Empireball invades and is defeated by Odenathus, but then the Gallic Empireball and Palmyrene Empireball manage to secede for a bit.
Christianism and death
As we all know, in 33 AD a Jewish hippie died and thus Christianism born. Firstly, Ancient Romeball persecuted it due to Hellenismball being the main religion but in the Fourth Century, Ancient Romeball converted to Chalcedonismball.
- Hi, I live in the Roman Empire and I was wondering- Is Loving Jesus Legal Yet?? (quote from Bill Wurtz)
- SPQRball: Non... Actually, Okay bene! (said Constantine)
During this period, the Empire got split into Western Roman Empireball and Eastern Roman Empireball to reduce the Germanic migrants that were threatening to destroy the Empire, what they later did in 476 with Western Roman Empireball.
- "Veni, vidi, vici" - (I came, I saw, I conquered).
- "Roma invicta" - (Rome Unconquered. It was an inspirational motto. It refers to that Ancient Rome was never conquered)
- “Errare humanum est” - (To err is human. Making a mistake is part of being human)
- "Est tempus for Pax Romana!" - (It is time for Roman Peace)
- "Victory to the Great Roman Empire!" - (said by Julius Ceasar)
- "All Roads Lead to Rome" - (it refers to the fact that all of Rome's roads radiated outward from its capital into the Roman Empire)
- "Hail Rome" - (a Roman greeting such as Hail Ceasar)
- Greeceball: The filius of Byzantineball. My smart grandson who invented democracy long time ago,his father is destroyed by kebabs and he is now of very poor,I hope he recovers himself.
- North Macedoniaball: WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?! I DON'T UNDERSTAND YOUR SLAVIC BULGARIAN LANGUAGE. YOU ARE NOT HELLENIC! YOU ARE BULGARIAN YOU HERE ME! EVEN MACEDON IS PISSED OFF AT YOU!
- Italyball: The
disappointmentfilius of Western Roman Empireball. dare gloriam, yet grandchild. He created his own version of the Latine language... the Italian language. He has great cuisine, just like me! His food est of international recognition, especially pizza and pasta, and his clay est rich in meum historia having inherited the Italian Peninsula where meum capital Romeball and most of meum historia happened and he have great cult.
- Franceball: Meum another Grandchild. She is sister of Italyball. Also created her own version of the Latine language... the French language. She has great cultura, just like me! She est the most visited countryball in the mundus, vero a pillar of civilization like Ego was a pillar of civilization in the mundus antiquorum! Her food est also well known: baguette, croissant. Just like me she cannot decide between Imperium or Res Publica. In the end she settled for Res Publica while Ego settled for Imperium.
- Romaniaball & Moldovaball: Meum Eastern European grandchildren. They speaks their own version of Latine, Romanian. They sunt the fratris of Franceball, Italyball and cognata of Greeceball. They have great corruptioni, just like me! umm... ok... that's not bonum... They sunt the closest in grammar to me! Preserving certain features of Vulgar Latine that other Romance languages lost, such as three genders (Masculine, Feminine and Neuter) and all six Latine cases. Their food est mostly traditional but bonum: mici, mămăligă. YOU ARE ALL NOT DACIAN YOU ARE LATIN!!!
- Sardiniaball: He est Italy's younger fratris and est meum grandchildren that Ego interested in. Ego interested in the language he speaks... it's close to Latine, the language that Ego used to speak. Grandson, Ego applaud tu for keeping a language that est almost close to mine even though it has been extinct. Hope you get along with your fratres.
- Spainball and Portugalball: Born during between Western Roman Empireball, Gauls and Visigoths. Also speaks their own version of Latine... the Spanish and Portuguese language. They had great Imperiums, just like me! Because of them Ego have great legatum under the form of most spoken languages in America Meridionalis! They also have great food just like me and their fratres! Paella, Tapas, Tortilla for Spainball. Bacalhau, Broa de Avintes for Portugalball
- South American countryballs - grandchildren, filius of Spainball and Portugalball. Latine yet lives! (my favorite is Brazilball because he likes me) I'm proud of them.
- Mexico and Central American Countryballs - grandchildren, filius of Spainball.
- - Caribbiean Countryballs
- Philippinesball - Grandson from Spainball from the Far East, Latin lives on!.
- Holy Roman Empireball - My son?
Totally not a product of rape.
Saderan Empire and Septim Empire - My Grandsons from the another worlds and they has a war on their terras!
- Ancient Greeceball - Is complicatus.
- Ptolemaic Egyptball - Somehow amicus.
- Ancient Armeniaball - Vassal.
- Byzantineball - Orthodox Successor. Unfortunatly he does not like Latine. He also did not liked when I called that guy named Jesus a hippie.
- Holy Roman Empireball - "Latine" Successor BUT HE IS OF GERMANOS!!!
- Christianityball - The only reason why Ego legalized tu because Ego saw that hippie in my dreams.
Such ironia how it was me who crucified him
- Hellenismball - Tu helped shaped me into the Mighty Imperium that Ego known of but Ego thought it was tempus to pick a novus religion.
- Kingdom of Aksumball- Orthodox Christian brothers. Great trading partners in which he is probably is the best African brother other than ancient Egypt.
- Hanball - Hey! Thanks for your silks to me and thus trade with me! *
Althought he let Xiongnu come!!!!*
- Germaniaball - Filthy, barbaric immigrants. How dare tu defeat me!
- Ptolemaic Egyptball: EGO DEFEATED TU! HA!
- Etruscanball - Raped our Lucretia.
- Kushball-REMOVE NUMBAINS FORM EGYPTIAN PREMISISS!! I PRAY FOR THE ASKUMS JEWS TO KILL YOU!!!
- Gaulball - Barbarians
- Daciaball - Stupidus heretics and the worst enemy EVER. ROMANIA IS OF LATIN NO DACIAN!!! AND NEVER RISE AS AN EMPIRE AGAIN! AND NEVER FORGET THE FIRST DACIAN WAR,WHEN I LOST! AND YOU FORCED ME TO PAY YOU TRIBUTE OF 8 MOTHERFUCKING MILLION SESTERCES!THANKS TO MY INCOMPETENT EMPEROR OF DOMITIAN!
- Sassanidball - Was of meum grandis rival back then.
- Carthageball - Worst rival ever, Carthago Delenda Est!
- Seleucidball - Their incompetent king tried to take my land.
- Kingdom of Pontusball - Tried to take my land.
- Parthiaball - Most powerful barbarian known. Defeated my general at 53 AD.
- Xiongnu confederacyball - Actually I do not know much about him. But his sons (Great Seljukball, Ottomansball, Rumball) kılled my son!! HOW DARE YOU!!!
YOU DİRTY KEBAB! (I still don't know what is kebab but remove!)
- Empire of Japanball - I have bigger Clay Empire than yuo! HAHAHAHAHA! TU CANNOT INTO BIGGER EMPIRE!!!
- Kingdom of Italy- My great grandson who wanted to reserect me
How to draw
- Draw a circle filled with red
- Draw SPQR in the middle using gold and add a laurel wreath of the same color
- Draw eyes and you're finished
- Recommended, but not necessary, draw a galea or a laurel wreath