April 27, 1994 - Present
Relations and opinions
(3-0 NEVER FORGET)
|Orange Free Stateball, other Boerball republics, Union of South Africaball|
Is of importants
Can into space?
And oh yeah, Springboks Rule (2019 Rugby World Cup champions)!
Still under lockdown and over 1 million cases...
|“||SOUTH AFRIKA FOREVEAR! NKOSI SIKELEL' IAFRICA!!!!||”|
|“||Tsamina mina zangalewa, This time for Africa||”|
South Africaball, officially the Republic of
Tweebuffelsmeteenskootmorsdoodgeskietfontein and Elon Musk South Africa, is a countryball in southern Africa. South Africaball's favourite pastime is digging deep holes in its clay as it is full of valuable minerals like gold, platinum, manganese, chrome, iron, vanadium, and diamonds. He can into farm with long name.
South Africaball is a member of the G20 (or Group of Twenty) group formed by the countryballs that have the 19 largest economies plus the EU.
South Africaball is also one of the newly industrialized countryballs, with the others being Brazilball, Chinaball, Indiaball, Indonesiaball, Malaysiaball, Mexicoball, The Philippinesball, Thailandball and Turkeyball.
South Africaball has a long history but didn't write much down until recently although there is a lot of Khoisanball rock-art graffiti everywhere.
During the iron age, the civilization of Mapungubweball also existed and they traded with the east coast and built huge stone structures because they were bored and it would confuse future generations.
In the 15th Century, Portugalball started looking for a shortcut to the far east and "found" the Cape, although it wasn't lost.
In the 16th Century, the Dutchball needed a lay-over to India and started a veggie garden in the Cape. Some Huguenotballs arrived as well, escaping persecution in Europe. They were very good at making wine so were allowed in, irrelevant of their beliefs!
In the 17th Century, Dutchball decided to make it a colony and make of moneys a lot with trade.
In the 18th century when Dutchball clay was taken by Franceball, UKball arrived uninvited and take over but not give of back to Dutchball when Franceball was defeated. This annoyed Dutchballs, who took their Huegnotball friends with and moved inland to become the Boerballs.
In the 19th Century, the Boerballs met the Zuluball and other 8balls and had a few hectic arguments. Boerball would close their wagons into a circle, pray and then shoot all the Zuluballs attacking. It seemed to work well. One of Zuluball sons, Ndebeleball, however, was causing his own havoc, chasing everyone around. Eventually Lesothoball hid in the mountains to escape all this nonsense. This is why Lesothoball now lies in the middle of South Africa, and why South Africaball looks like a donut.
In the late 19th Century, the Boerballs found gold and diamonds, and UKball decided they needed to join the empire. UKball brought Indiaball and Australia to help. This war is called the Anglo-Boer War. UKball thought it was taking too long to defeat some uncouth farmers, so started burning down farms and put Boerballs and 8balls in concentration camps. The Boerballs were finally made to agree that joining the empire was maybe a good idea.
In 1931 UKball decided to give independence to Canadaball, Australiaball, New Zealandball, Irelandball and, of course, South Africaball. All they needed was just to sign a document called Statute of Westminster. Canadaball and South Africa signed the document (Australia only signed in 1942, New Zealand signed in 1947, and Ireland never signed the document and said to UK that he was already independent since 1922)
South Africaball finally become tired of the monarchy (his government was like the government of Australia, Canada and New Zealand) and declared itself a republic in 1961.
South Africaball is one of the few African countryballs that have never experienced a coup d'etat or entered a civil war after the decolonization process, in addition to regular elections being held for nearly a century.
South Africaball learnt some silly superiority ideas from UKball, got it wrong and ruled by Apartheid (Racial segregation). Boerballs started acting like UKballs and 8balls were given their own countryballs to make living off of and were moved out of the cityballs in South Africaball which caused all the 8balls to stop talking with each other and be excluded from the South African society.
This is the main reason that South Africaball suffers from multiple personality disorder today. South Africaball is in therapy for this problem.
South Africaball also used to enjoy crossing its neighbors' borders without permission, especially those of Angolaball, apparently to stop communism from spreading. USAball financed this exercise through the CIAball "freedom outreach program".
South Africaball was the first country in Africa to build nuclear weapons which were of the taken by Americaball for 'safekeeping'. The 2ball's were of the very smart in South Africaball. It clandestinely tested two of them in the desert and then got caught by USAball, who was wondering where the huge earthquakes came from, oops!, After all that fuss South Africaball voluntarily gave them up as they had become obsolete. South Africaballs nuclear weapons were replaced by the deadly Vuvuzela.
With the end of apartheid, everyone in South Africa has gained equal rights (although many still complain about it), but the country has also been plagued by corruption in recent years because of a certain person who became the country's president. There have been also multiple attacks on the country's white farmers.
In 2017, South Africaball can now into winnings in Miss Universe for the first time in 39 years thanks to Demi-Leigh Nel-Peters. In 2019, South Africaball claimed its second crown in 3 years thanks to Zozibini Tunzi.
|Black||0, 0, 0||C0-M0-Y0-K100||#000000|
|Spanish Yellow||255, 182, 18||C0-M29-Y93-K0||#FFB612|
|Philippine Green||0, 122, 77||C100-M0-Y37-K52||#007A4D|
|White||255, 255, 255||N/A||#FFFFFF|
|CG Red||222, 56, 49||C0-M75-Y78-K13||#DE3831|
|Imperial Blue||0, 35, 149||C100-M77-Y0-K42||#002395|
South Africaball loves to braai (its like barbecue, but way better!) South Africaball belongs to the BRICS, the SADC, (basically all the neighbors, who crash the braai) and the African Union. South Africaball is also part of Commonwealthball.
- Weed Friends - SMOKE WEED! YEAH!
- Lesothoball and Eswatiniball - My cousins. I believe you are actually part of me.
which is true
- Australiaball - BBQ buddies, is invited to the braai as he always brings excellent lamb-chops. All the 2balls want to move here eventually. (MY BRAAI IS BETTER THAN YOUR BARBIE!)
- Malaysiaball- A South East Asian version of me because he also have many different races such as Malays, Chinese, Indians and many many more just like me blacks, whites and many else and proof that many different races in one country = One nation.
- Ghanaball - Good friend which me and him are the co-founders of the the AU. I like coffin dance, and we also both can into space and can into rich! We also both hate Scam boi. He also invented pan africanisum.
- Namibiaball - My stepson, I had to eventually give him independence, after UNball got upset.
- Mauritiusball - I spend my holidays most of the time there.
- Ethiopiaball - The founder of the African Union. The headquarters is located in Addis Ababa He is a very good role model for Africa. His Monarchy is filled with greatness and fulfilling power, and now he is the heart of Africa. My flag was inspired by his.
- Botswanaball - I think I'm a snob as they seem better educated, however I like to braai with him and laugh at the other SADCballs.
- Mozambiqueball - I enjoy him coming to the braai, but I don't understand anything he says. He all sounds like gibberish "selling cabbages?".
- Zimbabweball - I don't talk much about my cousin, who may have gone clinically mad.
- Japanball - I love bakkies (Utes!) and minibuses that are built by Japanball, so I allow those to come to my braai. Yo, ninja, go!
- Netherlandsball - Estranged father of me. Speaks of different language now but can still into understandings.
- USAball - BEST ALLY, OF COURSE, He buys all of my fancy diamonds.
Take that, my Elon Musk now richer than your stupid Jebb
- Canadaball - Good friend, supported the end of the Apartheid, helped us in our development and in the fight against AIDS. We have a lot in common as our constitutions and the taste for sports.
- Russiaball - Are in BRICS together. I’m glad that you hate The United States!!!! I don’t care what America thinks about you!!!!!
- Brazilball - Adoptive Brother/ Cousin, we are powerful developing countryballs, both love soccer, and both are in BRICS together
- Indiaball - Inspired me for revolution. He has many of its people in the klein town of Durbanball. They were both colonized by Britain but now are in BRICS together, DEFEND CURRY! Gandhiji became a lawyer in our clay and formed Natal Congress. We are inspired by his satyagraha. So DEFEND GANDHI!!!!!
I hate how dare he call us Kaffirs. also hypocrite.
- African Unionball - New and Improved African Unity.
- Indonesiaball - Brother colonized by Netherlandsball. His kebab hero (Sheikh Yusuf al-Makasari) who sent by Netherlands to My clay, was the 1st people who spread Islam in My clay. Thanks a lot! He send batik to my clay, our president love batik so much.
We both can into hating our minorities in our clay (SUHARTO BEST PRESIDENT)
- Chinaball - Largest trading partner and in BRICS together, DEFEND DUMPLING! AND STOP CORONAVIRUS!
- South Koreaball - Best Korea, we both have "South".
- Cubaball - We really got along since the end of apartheid, I'm not really close to him but he's really nice I don't care what America says.
- New Zealandball - We both love rugby, but we had a bit of trouble in 1981 when my apartheid rugby team toured him.
- Cabo Verdeball - Let me fly over his clay.
- Romaniaball - Is of good friend and likes Pretoriaball but plox stop hating Russiaball. He hates me. He is my selfish Balkan ally.
- Gaddafiball - Although he is a controversial ally, he's my freind because he supported Mandela while he was imprisoned. "Those who feel irritated by my friendship with President Gaddafi can go jump in the pool."
- BLACK IS KING - YAY FINALLY Beyonce Finally They made a song about ME!!! Though They made 25% of their songs for the Stupid Pyramids and made 75% of their songs about THIS HACKER...at least they had one song about me!!! YAAAAYY!!
Y**oslavlball - Good city
- UKball - South Africaball has a love/hate relationship with his Step-father, UKball. UKball hasn't apologized for the concentration camps from the Anglo-Boer war yet or for stealing the Cullinan diamond.
- Philippinesball (Only in Miss Universe Pagent) - YUO THOUGHT YOUR ACE WILL WIN IN MISS UNIVERSE 2019?, THINK AGAIN! WE WON THIS YEAR ! AND NEXT YEAR YOU WON'T AND I WIN AGAIN! 2019 BEST YEAR OF MY LIFE (ZOZIBINI TUNZI NO. 1) YOUR SONG FOR CATRIONA SO CRINGE! AND STOP REMOVING DRUGS, TRAITOR! But we can both intro G20.
- Union of South Africaball - Ah You fuckin evil father who hates me because I'm black and I endorse pan Africanism. Fun fact, I am now have been prompted co-founder in THE AU and it is because I get rid of you evil caucasian dumbass. Fuck you Nelson Mandela Stronk!
- Organisation of African Unityball - Pierce of crap. He never helped me in aprahead times. At least in the new union, I am in charge and enforce pan Africanism!
- Spainball (Only in Football) - YUO OF WINNINGS 2010 WORLD CUP (WHICH I HOSTED)?? YUO WILL PAY! REMOVE IKER CASILLAS!
- Tunisiaball - AFRICAN MAGNET!!!!!
- Kosovoball - KOSOVO JE SRBIJA!!!
- Denmarkball - Your prime minister enough said!
- Finlandball - He hates me because of WW2!
- Nigeriaball - I am the best African country, not you! Stop accusing me of hurting your citizens!
- Egyptball - Same as the Nigeriaball. You're SO OVERRATED! and stop trying to claim your middle eastern to defend yourself..
- Ukraineball - Crimeaball is Russiaball's!
- Lesothoball - You and that other little warrior are mine! GIB! SOUTH AFIRKA IS STRONK!
- Boliviaball - Reverted to anti-imperialism and yuo cannot into sea ever!
South Africaball owns and leases some other clay:
- Robben Islandball: used be a colony for sick balls suffering from leprosy and then a prison for Mandela and his uppity 8balls, now touristic attraction with museums.
- Marion Islandball: 2700km south east off the coast, where South Africaball conducts weather research and may have rented it out to Israelcube to test a nuclear weapon, oops.
- Prince Edward Islandsball (no, not the Canadian Province): birthday present from Stepdad. very cold with penguins pooping everywhere.
- SANAE 4: Research station in Antarcticaball.
South Africaball enjoys playing football (or Soccer for USAball), rugby and cricket. South Africaball hates to lose against Australiaball and New Zealandball and will sulk for days on end. Sport is considered the main religion with Christianity. The Vuvuzela is used as a psychological weapon to annoy the opposing team into making mistakes. South Africaball hosted the 2009 FIFA Confederations Cup as well as the 2010 FIFA World Cup. South Africaball also won the 1995, 2007 and 2019 Rugby World Cup.
Cycling has also become a favorite sport of South Africaball. Multi-time Tour de France champion Chris Froome (though born in Kenyaball) spent his high school years in Johannesburgball, and in 2013 Daryl Impey became the first African rider to wear the coveted yellow jersey. South Africaball also proud to be the home of the first African-registered professional road cycling team, NTT Pro Team (formerly Team Dimension Data).
- “Now-Now" and "Just-Now" are totally valid concepts of time, if South Africaballs coming over for a beer "now-now", it could perhaps be arriving at Botswanaballs in five minutes. But if South Africaball is coming "just-now", Botswanaball could expect to wait 20 minutes or 30 or even 45. Just-now, darn it isn’t it obvious?!
- "Babbelaas", You know that feeling after a heavy night out on the town? South Africaball offers a term that is far more descriptive of one's feeling of complete and utter uselessness!
- "Eish!" in everyday lingo, ”eish!” is a term that could best be described as an exclamation of light shock.
- "Howzit!" Howzit sort of shortens that to “How is it?”
- "My Chinaball!" No, not the country. Your best friend is your Chinaball. Don't ask where it came from; just accept it and next time you see your best buddy Botswanaball, say, "Howzit, my Chinaball!"
- "Gatvol!" Translated literally, this word means ”the hole is full.” Used as a term of absolute frustration, one is gatvol when one has had enough.
- "Ja Nee" Translated, this means “Yes No” in Afrikaans. Yes, this is a paradox. No, it’s not seen as a contradiction in terms. South Africaball knows exactly what it means: So-so, Maybe.
- "Ja-Well-No-Fine" Rolling off the tongue as one word, this phrase has taken on a sarcastic twist to mean that someone telling you something might be pretending to tell the truth, but actually the reality of the situation is the opposite.
- "Ag Nee!" Translated from Afrikaans, it literally means "Oh No!" but is much more expressive. It is used when something goes horribly wrong, and even when one wants to display a little sympathy.
- "Jassis" Pronounced "yussis", it is usually used to express shock, surprise and the occasional tinge of annoyance.
- "Click click" A reference to the fact that many of its languages, such as Zulu and Xhosa, contain click consonants.