The stars at night are dull and dim, when they have to be over dumb old stupid Texas!
You can always tell a Texan, but’cha can’t tell him much.
— Engineer, Team Fortress 2

Texasball is a state of the USA-icon USAball. He is an ass full of money possibly one of the most conservative American stateball ever. He is possibly also one of the most likely to secede from USA-icon USAball, due to his rebellious personality. Should he secede, it would severely weaken USAball, as many states heavily rely on Texas for certain resources. He is a rather trigger happy fellow, even for an American state.

Texasball is sometimes seen wearing shades and his iconic hat. He may also have a Colt Peacemaker, a Winchester rifle, or a shotgun.


Texas was born as 3-icon until he was adopted by Spainball in 1519, tried being a republic twice as 1st Republic of Texasball and 2nd Republic of Texasball. Franceball tried taking him, but natives and the climate killed him off. He then later was adopted by Mexicoball and combined with Coahuilaball to form Coahuila y Tejasball. He then gained independence for 10 years, those ten years were spent deciding if he should Join the United States of America or expand west to compete with America. He decided to join America in 1845. He had a bit of a rebellious phase and seceded then joined CSAball. He then rejoined USAball in 1870. In 1900 he struck oil in Spindletop and since then, his economy has been booming rivaling Canadaball and Brazilball in GDP. Lately he's been considering secession again. 



  • USA-icon USAball (Adoptive Father) (give me burger)(sometimes) - Adoptive Father and former Civil War enemy, he is still steamed about his confusion with Chile-icon Chileball, he also won't let me move out. But ever since Harvey, don't even think I'm ready yet. BUT, you legalized LGBT though! And I don't like it..
  • California-icon Californiaball (sometimes) - Liberal younger brother, ideological opposite. Argue with 'em a lot, but is just frenemy. We will protect each other from threats. Your Dodgers never had a chance against my Astros, 'cause they won the World Series! We also both want independence from USA-icon this guy. We will split up the states in-between each other once we both into independence. But my Christian network is better than yours! HAHAHAHAHA!!
  • NewMexico-icon New Mexicoball - My younger brother. We don't talk much, but we're chill. (Although, he used to be my clay)
  • Colorado-icon Coloradoball - Younger brother (Also a bit of him used to be my clay), somewhat a moderate between me and Californiaball. Though he gets annoyed sometimes when Californiaball and I both invade his clay, yet he likes weed.
  • Other Southernballs - My half brothers! (CSA-icon special former relationship)
  • All other Stateballs - Also some of my half brothers!
  • Chihuahua-icon Chihuahuaball, Coahuila-icon Coahuilaball, Nuevo León-icon Nuevo Leónball, Tamaulipas-icon Tamaulipasball - Mexican stateballs that send too many drugs and immigrants over the Rio Grande. Can't forgive 'em for that.
  • UK-icon UKball - Grandfatherr.. tell dad to gib me a gun this christmas ploxx..
  • Spain-icon Spainball - Grandmother, don't know much about her, she's nice from all I remember. And from what my dad told me.
  • Australia-icon Australiaball - Adoptive uncle that has a lot in common with Texas-icon Texasball. They wear silly hats, have funny accents, have very big egos, etc. But annoyingly his son, Western Australiaball, is even bigger than me and the darn Alaska put together!
  • Queensland-icon Queenslandball - The 'Australian Texas' as they say it here.. So obviously, we get along darn good.
  • Western Cape-icon Western Capeball - The 'African Texas?' Don't understand why there's a lotta me's around here, I approve that at least.
  • Canada-icon Canadaball and New Zealand-icon New Zealandball - Adoptive Uncles.
  • Ireland-icon Irelandball - Adoptive great-uncle, who hates my adoptive grandpa.
  • Alberta-icon Albertaball - My cousin who is a lot like me, so we are friends.
  • Tennessee-icon Tennesseeball - Thanks for helping free me from Mexico-icon Mexicoball. Less cooler version of me.
  • Mexico-icon Mexicoball (sometimes) - We also both like bluegrass..
  •  South Vietnamball - Feel sorry about everything you go through. Just stay there in my basement, i'm here for you. 


  • Mexico-icon Mexicoball (sometimes) - Never forget 1846 or Alamo! And stop sending illegal immigrants. Nobody likes those anymore.
  • Chile-icon Chileball - FLAG STEALER! KTVT. But you are my uncle also so it kind of makes sense.
  • Colombia-icon Colombiaball - Stop sending drugs. It's annoying by now.
  • Alaska-icon Alaskaball - 1959 worst day of my life! (Not part of contiguous USAball, you don't count as biggest!)
  • California-icon Most Liberal state (sometimes) - Dang Commifornians Liberals! We are both ideological opposites and we often argue during elections, but at the end of the day we are friends. STOP TRYING TO TURN ME INTO A DARN LIBERAL. DON'T MAKE ME GO ALL CHUCK NORRIS ON YOUR ASS!!! DAYSTAR > TBN!
  • Russia-icon Russiaball - Alaska is yours you commie.. oh, wait, you're not a commie. But still a big idiot. You are the reason why I'm smaller than Alaska!! But, on the other hand, your child, Moscowball, we're in a pretty good relationship.. way better than you. Sometimes I think you adopted him. Props to that, but seriously, go to god damn hell.
  • Massachusetts-icon Massachusettsball - I just simply don't like 'em.
  • Virginia-icon Virginiaball - WHAT? CBN? Bring it!
  • Florida-icon Floridaball - WHAT? CTN, you say? Bring it on!
  • Moscow-icon Moscowball - ..Eh, eh.. I don't want to hate ya, my dad forces me to. You're a pretty nice guy when I think about it. But why are you so shy around me? Are you scared? Hah, anyways, as I'm meant to say, hate you, Moscow..
  • Indiana-icon Indianaball

Major Cityballs

  • Austin-icon (flag 1) Austinball - Liberal Capitalball that's populated with California-icon Californian implants. It’s somehow best place to live in America, so I'm proud of you. Also needs a new flag.
  • Houston-icon Houstonball - Largest cityball in the state and only big cityball that can into Gulf of Mexico.
  • Dallas-icon Dallasball - Them cowboys became urbanized. Sterotypical Texan city the rest of the world sees.
  • San Antonio-icon San Antonioball - One of Texas's oldest cities. Ball is life, and so are Tacos.
  • El Paso-icon El Pasoball - Sketchy, haunted Mexican cityball in the great Texan outback. Ugly duckling of Texan cityballs.
  • Fort Worth-icon Fort Worthball - Dallasball's less relevant twin that is famous for its stockyards. (Psst! Don't ever mention Dallas!)
  • Rio Grande Valley - Just like El Paso, but has more Mexicans. Which I don't like.
  • College Station-Icon College Stationball - Can into relevant?
  • Bryanball - Can into relevant?






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